Four Beautiful Things Thursday

1. Cheerful Insomnia. Falling asleep well past sunrise laughing, talking, and remembering with the people who matter most in this world.
2. Yellow Bunnies. Because when your now grown up cousin tells you he still has the yellow bunny you gave him when he was one, to remember you by, you can't help but feel a sudden rush of warm goodness in your soul.
3. Squirrel Tikka Masala. When you can pick up with old friends as though no time passed in between [with inside jokes to boot!], what a lovely thing indeed!
4. Aamina. Pedicures or hair woes, late night talks, or laughing for no reason, you're more than a cousin, you're the sister I never had, and a beautiful part of my life.

Readings and Watchings

I updated my book and movie reviews! [Favorite Book: Undomestic Goddess- its fun! Favorite Movie: The Dark Knight, hands down] I'm on a hunt for good books to fulfill my 50 books in 2008 goal. Any suggestions much appreciated!

On Running

I hate running and I hate that I hate running. All through school on the one mile runs, you'd see a crowd of runners, and then me in the distance panting and wheezing with a flushed face. Once after finishing a mile at 16:25, my 7th grade PE teacher shook his head "Aisha, maybe you just can't do it." For many years I accepted his perception as my truth but it bothered me. Why can't I do it? Both of my brothers ran cross country, my dad jogs every day, we share genetic makeup, surely in me is a runner? Year after year I tried but .25 miles into the run cramps built up, wheezing ensued and I'd end up hunched over hobbling the rest of the way home. Eventually, I gave up.

One day over lunch, I told a co-worker I couldn't run. He shot me a raised eyebrow and told me he went from couch potato to marathon runner in 10 weeks. He said I could do it if I simply persisted. So ever the optimist I tried again, this time doing a little more research before hitting the pavement. I began in intervals of walking mostly and running in spurts, slowly over time I found myself running more than I walked. Today, for the first time in my life, I ran one mile without stopping. I never thought I could do it, but simply by getting up and trying, I proved my PE teacher wrong.

I wanted to share some of the links that are helping me reach my goal (My ultimate goal is to run a 5K, its only three miles but a feat for me at this point). I hope it helps you as it has helped me if you are inclined to pick up the sneakers and run. If you are a runner with tips, please share!

• This link can calcuate routes in your neighborhood or any place else to determine the distance you need to run to reach your goals.
• For couch potatoes looking to become runners, this link helped me get started on a schedule to start running.
  
• How to avoid cramps here.
  
• Some cool general tips on running here.
  
• If you think you don't have the time, or motivation to do so, read this because suddenly you will realize, you have no excuse.
• And finally, this picture helps remind me that genetic makeup or not, if I want it bad enough I can do it. (Thanks for the link Tee!):

Serenity Now

The subtle ways we affect one another never fail to astound me. I have the ability to transmit positive energies into the world through simple acts of kindness and good will. Holding a door, paying the toll for someone behind me, simply smiling can brighten a day. And those whose days I brighten may then send more positivity in a chain reaction that reverberates beyond my one simple act. Conversely, we also have the ability to negatively affect one another by our subtle words and actions which cling to us beyond the encounter and sends further seeds of gloom into the world. But chains can be broken. Today I'm breaking the chain and will instead put positivity into the world. This is an inspiring poem by Christian Larson. I hope it lifts your spirits today too. And of course, if that doesn't work, you can adopt the mantra Serenity Now.

Promise Yourself
To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.
To make all your friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature you meet.
To give so much time to improving yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud word, but in great deeds.
To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side, so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

Sandeela Kanwal

In some parts of the world when a baby boy is born, they kill a goat and feed it to the poor. When a baby girl is born, they kill the girl, and pretend that nothing happened. [And please don't make this a religion thing, I don't care if its used to justify, it doesn't make that the reality. Read here, and here of other people practicing the same atrocity]. It seems girls are expendable in the womb, at birth and apparently 25 years into their lives. In my own city, 25 year old Sandeela Kanwal was strangled to death on Tuesday morning by her father. Why? Because she wanted a divorce from the husband her father forced her to marry.

For reasons I cant elaborate on this story is extremely personal to me. Words bubble to the surface yet I find myself speechless. I keep thinking, had I known her, could I have helped? How many others here are in her shoes? Do I know them? Unfortunately, these matters are kept so secret its hard to know. Our culture of izzat forces women to stay silent on the sins against them in the name of family honor. In England this problem is being public addressed but its rarely mentioned in the US so I presumed it didn't happen, but today I learned, at Sandeela's expense, the problem is here too.

These girls need resources, and options. They need to know they don't have to accept and endure abuse. That even though their parents are supposed to love them, it does not mean they should always blindly trust them. But what good are these words on this screen? My plan is to research what's available to help women in the US. At the very least I can create a simple website pooling resources and links of help for these women. Should they desperately search, something there to help. But most of all, more than the resources these women need to know it is not ok for anyone, even your parents to violate your basic human rights. How do you undo years of training that taught them otherwise? Again, I am left without an answer.

I plan to attend his trial. I want to know what twists a mind to commit this sin against their own flesh and blood. I want to know why he told the Judge on Tuesday that he did nothing wrong. And I want to be in the courtroom when I see with my own eyes, justice for Sandeela Kanwal.

On people watching, perceptions, and reality

Saturday evening in Asheville, Kashif and I sat on a brick wall, dangling our feet taking in life around us. A couple sat in a coffee shop across the way, a tear ran down the woman's cheek as the man gestured with his hands, a tense expression on his face. Two men with long hair and tattoos played cards on a street bench. A young girl of about nine in a prim blue frock played violin on the street corner while her parents, partially hidden in the distance, snapped pictures as people shook their heads and dropped dollars at her feet.

Suddenly we were startled by a loud screech. A young man in a pale blue Rolls Royce convertible pulled up to parallel park in front of us. Three cars could comfortable fit in the space he now struggled to park in. Twice he nearly slammed his car into the Volkswagen behind him. So the rich don't need to learn how to park? I thought. Two men, clearly homeless, approached the car. Loudly, jumping up down and waving their hands, they tried helping him back in. As he parked more men began surrounding his car. The sun was quickly setting and I grew alarmed. As I pressed my hand against my phone, one man with tattered khakis and a flannel shirt reached into the car. He pulled out a walker and placed it on the sidewalk; another opened the car door and a third helped him onto the curb. They promised to watch his car until he returned. The man smiled with a hint of sadness, and then with trembling legs, crossed the street.

It reminded me of a quote by Matthew Fox: One event can be perceived so differently by different people...It’s amazing to me how people can walk around thinking that the way that they see the world is the only way because it’s just not the truth.

I hope I will always remember this subtle lesson on perception.

Three Beautiful Things Thursday

Kashif. Today is our six year anniversary. I wanted to say something insightful on the matter, but nothing comes to mind except that I love him so much and that having him in my life makes each day no matter how trying, inevitably a beautiful day for me. Alhamdullilah.


Drivable Distance Destinations. With plane tickets so high, particularly this weekend, bed and breakfasts amidst the Smoky mountains a few short hours away are a beautiful way to escape and relax, indeed.

Patience. Hope. Peace.
To acquire them is a struggle, to achieve them is beautiful.
I hope to one day have all three.