Friday, February 06, 2009

Baby times Eight

Unless you've been living under a rock with your iPod blaring full blast you've heard of the single unemployed woman who recently had octuplets [adding to her previous brood of six children, all young]. At first I was angry at a doctor who would implant so many embryos but now after seeing the woman defend her choices, I feel ill. What frustrates me is the fawning by the media on this woman, the offers in the millions so she can be rewarded for her behavior. I guess there's a reason the "bearded woman" and the "100 pound baby" were staples at circuses for generations. I just wish we wouldn't. I wish we could take these children away from her, and get her some help that she so clearly needs.

12 comments:

Bee Amma said...

It really pained me to see this nearly 6 minute clip. I just cannot watch american news, i can't ever take it seriously, it's just WEIRD the way they report, and just not normal. I don't understand why this lady is getting so much attention, and i don't see why it is anyones problem how she is going to afford them. No one would bat an eyelid if she had 14 children that were conceived normally, and didn't have a job. I don't think she planned on having 8 children in one go, and implanting multiple embryos in infertility cases is normal, as the chances of them progressing aren't very high. So she had 8 babies....it's a bit crap for the babies as i can't imagine how many weeks gestation they were born at, and it can't be great for them, but its no ones business!!!!!!!!!!! She wanted babies, so she got them. Why sensationalise it in the media and judge her? Why take her kids away from her? We can't prove that she is going to be an awful mum. Am i missing something here? Someones going to tell me psychotic about this lady and then i will regret leaving this message, but honestly, No one elses business or problem as far as i can see.

Bee Amma said...

As far as selective termination goes, does anyone think that is EASY? Choosing a few of your kids that you are going to kill off. I don't see what she did that was so wrong......but i'm open to debate!!!

Aisha said...

Bee Amma- thanks for your comment. I could just say "yeah her life, who cares about her or her babies?" But I don't feel that way. First, my career is in child advocacy and I work with children who are disabled the vast majority of whom (perhaps its just luck or chance) were pre-term children. I recently attended a panel where IVF and other ART were discussed and the issue is becoming a societal issue with consequent societal burdens when more and more women have IVF leading in multiples as high as this woman had. she is a face to a growing issue, and her issue in particular is troubling in and of itself. Even in Islam it says when one of your Ummah hurts everyone hurts. This woman is not Muslim and we're not in a Muslim country, but the concept behind it is that when something is amiss amongst us, it is all of our problems to a certain degree. when people bought subprime mortgages and then went into foreclosure, at first people said "their business, their mistake." But now we are seeing a global melt down as a result of the Subprime mortgage market (at least that's what analysts in the US are saying). Some issues are global issues and affect society, to some degree affects us, and in this particular instance I care because those children are innocent and I worry about them. Perhaps I should not care about these children since they are not mine, but I do. It's why I've chosen the life I have in advocating for children who are not mine. I think by talking about instances such as this are good to talk about and discuss, and this woman in particular is not shying away from the public eye so my sympathy for her is very minimal.

As for aborting certain fetuses and why she didn't, there are arguments for and against it but I agree, that's a tough one and I have no opinion about it.

For a blog post that I thought rocked, and which I forgot to include in my post, you can read this one: http://www.alittlepregnant.com/

Anyways, this may be one in which you fundamentally disagree with me and that's okay :) I respect and do understand where you are coming from but I wanted to explain my perspective.

Anonymous said...

I don't think we should take them away. But I think it's wrong that there was a doctor who was willing to go through IVF in this case in the first place. The lady was a single mom with 6 kids; all 14 kids have a sperm donor as a dad, from what I've read.

Bee Amma said...

hey aisha, thanks for replying to my comment. My view wasn't that because they aren't my children we shouldn't care about them, and yes i have seen pre term babies at work, who are poorly and in hospital all the time, so i really do know what you are talking about, and completely agree with you there. What i mean to say is, that i felt more than anything else that the news was making a big issue out of her not being able to afford her own children....and in a way was sort of judging her as she will probably end up on welfare and end up being "the tax payers" problem. That i don't agree with, the kids deserve food, and a roof over their heads, i'm not particularly bothered where the money comes from.
As for the IVF thing, again, i don't know if her intentions were to have that many babies, but i think it is the responsibility of the medical practitioner to advise people properly about what they are doing. I think implanting 6 embryos is a bit much (maybe that is normal, but i thought it was usually only 3 or 4) Either way, i think it is sad how a total freak show has been made out of this womans life. There are more important things to report about.
I think instead of taking someones children away, which isn't really solving a problem, the problem should be addressed in the first instance, and proper education and help be given to these women. I feel sorry for the kids, and yes it should not be allowed to happen, but i think its rare for that many to be born in one go, and most probably not deliberate (although entirely self inflicted) am i confusing you here??! lol. I am not as good at expressing my thoughts as you, but i hope you ge tthe gist of what i am saying! :)

pixie said...

I get so angry everytime I hear about this. I can not see how any doctor would do this!!!! I think the women needs some psych eval. if you ask me. I really am not advocate for multiple births at all. The whole thing is just disturbing to me. I hate how they exploit their children for money. I scream at the tv everytime I seen Jon and Kate plus eight. ARG!!!

Aisha said...

Anon, Bee Amma, yes perhaps her babies should not be taken away from her. That is not for me to decide and I did rush to a conclusion there. I see what you are saying more clearly now. Yes, the media here is fixated in a freak circus type of way on what is unusual. It's not like that in the UK? I get the impression that its not since I usually rely on the BBC to get a dose of what's actually happening that truly constitutes as news. I think the welfare issue and judging her for possibly receiving it one day is the difference between the UK and the US... here welfare is practically non-existent in most states, and there just isn't much done to help the underprivileged as in the UK, so the attitude would naturally be different then. I do see what you are saying that them turning out into eight children is unusual and probably rare despite the implantation of 8 embroyos... and yes the doctor is the first one to point a finger at if a finger is to be pointed in this case as well as the lack of education of the mother. That is what the "www.alittlepregnant.com" discusses in more depth.

Pixie, Is Jon and Kate plus eight a show? I almost don't want to know. I wont be surprised if this lady end sup getting a deal as well. Ironically the woman wants to become ac ounseler as her means of supporting her 14 children. sigh.

Bee Amma said...

well i think i initially did hear about it on skynews, but it was a tiny news snippet, and mainly to say that the babies were all ok. there was no crazy focus on her being unemployed. im sorry, i dont mean to bash american news, but it really is a joke no? i find actually the best place to go for sensible, impartial news is al jazeerah english. even bbc and channel 4 have their pitfalls. i had no idea that welfare was a huge problem in the states, i think im too wrapped up in the bubble that is britain, help is available for everyone. free healthcare too. it makes me sick the way healthcare is all mostly private in the states, i am sure it breeds demonic doctors ready to do anything for a bit of cash. have heard some insane first hand stories too, it just should not be allowed. have you seen sicko btw aisha? michael moores documentary?

pixie said...

Sadly, Jon + Kate plus is a tv show. They already had twin girls by fertility treatments but Kate wanted one more and they ended up with 6. I've only watched the show once or twice because I'm not big fan of tv anyways but I really feel for the kids especially the older two.

Anonymous said...

Why did the announcer keep saying CONGRATULATIONS to the reporter?

mystic said...

Actually..it was more wrong on physician part! If she can't think clearly - physician has right to refuse so many embroys which actually can be a "very very dangerous" pregnancy.

I think, this girl is dumb and her doctor was dumber. She probably need psychiatric help. She is unemployed, talking about going to college, dumping kids on her own mom...she just want kids but with no sense of responsibilities. 15 years fast forward all kids will survive but they will be raised by society and welfare.

And where is the limit - what after 3 years she decides to have 5 more kids?

Aisha said...

BeeAmma, I don't trust our media and yes, I don't think they have their priorities in the right place .It's a very paparazzi like feel to the whole thing. I recently started reading Al-Jazeera.english and its pretty good! I really think the way we do health care here is sick. I work in a health related legal practice, and the amount of people strugglign to make ends meet, with no insurance and children with cancer and other illneses is depressing. I've been meaning to watch Sicko for some time now, I'm getting netflix soon ansd will add it to my movie queu.

Mystic, I agree completely. I think the doctor is more to blame than her as well. And yes, its scary what the future may hold for her since she's only 33 and has plenty of child bearing years to go.

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