Tuesday, July 10, 2012

The litmus test for love

Someone I love is going through a lot of pain. I want to take the pain away. I want to snatch it up, toss it in the trash and say there now, no need to think such thoughts anymore, but of course I can do no such thing. I have strong opinions on the matter but these opinions must be kept to myself since no one has asked me, and because it's not my opinion that will dictate the course of events.

K recently introduced me to a beautiful group Mumford & Sons and listening to them today as I swept the kitchen floor I heard these lyrics:

Love, it will not betray you
Dismay or enslave you, it will set you free
[Help you] be more like the man you were made to be

And I wept. Because I thought a) isn't this the litmus test for love? Why do people claim to love others and then tie their wings and why do people whose wings are not fully clipped refuse to fly? And b) why is it that sometimes the best thing I can do for someone is not swoop in and beg them to let me save them but instead bite my tongue, listen, and promise to always be there?


Anonymous said...

At times, that is pretty much all we can do...

mystic said...

Let a person make his or her decision...just stay there with trust that you will be around....Giving any kind of opinion or advise will hurt more..keep mouth zipppp

(Been there, done there at both sides of fence in life)

Aisha said...

Mystic, Ayesha, you are absolutely right. I will bite my tongue as I usually do. Sometimes it feels it might start to bleed is all. :0/

awomanmyage said...

It's a very tricky thing to know how to love. People love through their insecurities and fears and dysfunction. They don't teach how to love in school. Sometimes love is as you said, just by being there, holding their hand and the space in between you sacred.

fleur007 said...

I really learned a lot from this post. I am learning what love is from your blog and getting the courage to invite it in my life.

Love is giving of yourself and running when that person calls out to you. But it is also taking a step back and giving them space. When there is space there is room for growth. "True love sets you free." ~Mumford & Sons

And I guess this is like the Divine Love that God gives us. And the best qualities we can learn to try to instill within ourselves are those of the Divine. God created us with free-will. He lets us choose for ourselves and sets us free with His love. He knows we will err and fall, for sure. And the beauty He sees in us is when we get back up again and then prostrate to Him. This humanness and freewill that we have means that we will do bad but it is also the vehicle which enables us to surpass even angels! I think it is when we make these mistakes, when we err and then when our mind, body and soul prostrate to His Greatness in our realization of our fragility, our imperfection, our self-created pain that we can also become great.

So I guess when someone is making a mistake we just have to give them the same kind of Divine Love that Allah swt gives us and respect their journey of the human Soul. And, that they might be on their way to achieving spiritual greatness by virtue of discovering their own fallability!

Thanks for this inspirational post and for all the wonderful things you share and write! Love ya!!! ~Kulsum

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